Jack Johnson

If there were a contest to smoke a fatty with Jack Johnson, I would do everything in my power to win it. And here’s why:

1. He’s from Hawaii and, more accurately, he is Hawaii. Look at him. Chillin. Bonus: he says things like, “hala ka ukulele.”

2. He makes cliche look good. You could say he’s “cut his teeth” surfing owing to the fact that he’s Jeff Jackson-the famous surfer-‘s son. I think of Jeff Jackson’s parentage to little Jack like the turtle father and son from Finding Nemo. Think about it, braah. The mentality behind surfing, the art of harnessing a natural phenomenon with something so trivial as a board, taught to a son from his father-it doesn’t get more wholesome. Another cliche? Sure. Jack Johnson makes wet-behind-the-ears look good.

3. He recorded his latest album, Through the Static, using a 100% solar-powered studio which means Through the Static is made of sunshine. I don’t know about you, but I definitely wanna hang out with a guy who makes music out of sunshine.

4. He’s honest. My favorite Jack Johnsonism, In Between Dreams, is just that. Not even so much for the waking state, but this is an album made of songs that literally belong between your dreams. That said, don’t listen to it on a road trip or if you’re operating heavy machinery due to its soporific dopeness. Its straight up subconscious, man. But Jack doesn’t just tout the idea of genuineness. His honesty is pure and sincere. Jack wonders, are they laughing at me or with me? out loud. Because he can do that. Because he’s Jack Johnson. Andy Samberg’s Jack Johnson is hilarious (the Mellow Show) ’cause it’s probably true in not-so-many-words. And Jack Johnson probably should hang out with Dave Matthews, if he hasn’t already. Jason Mraz, too.

5. He does all his awesoming behind an acoustic guitar. C’mon.

So, hit me up Jack. I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

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