Even before I moved to Seattle [from sunny Orlando], I was up in the gym working on my fitness [I lived in a luxury apartment with my mom that had a pretty state-of-the-art gym at its beige, cookie cutter core], but I’ll admit I was seeing zip-zero results. Looking back, I see how I was sort-of doing everything wrong and for all the wrong reasons and I want to share it because maintaining good health and fitness is so important. It’s paramount. And a few people have been asking how I managed to lose 80 pounds. I love that! I really do! I wanna tell you all about it!
But first I should say [and it goes without saying, but I’m saying] I’m not a doctor. Nor do I plan to become one. Seek their advice for the matter-of-factual information.
That said, I did just take Nutrition and got a perfect score on my final exam. You could say that I enrolled in Nutrition 101 because it was an easy way to fulfill some non-laboratory science credit requirements and that I got what I deserved when the assignments slapped me in the face and beat me down late into the evening with the three-to-four-hour tests, plus assignments, plus reading. You could say that. If you wanted to. I, however, would say that I was challenged to search deep, deep within myself to find the study habits that worked best for me and to focus all of my attention on the matter at hand where it would normally, admittedly, drift off to space. I would say that I learned a great deal and that I picked Nutrition 101 because, as with all the classes I’ve taken so far, it applied directly to my real life situation, leaving drastic positive results in its wake. That’s what I would say. So there.
Back in Jam-lando, I actually started off on the right foot. I did what most people do who seek something new: asked advice from someone who was where I wanted to be. Ladyfriend of mine had lost major weight by eating well and working out. She showed me a picture of her at her biggest and I couldn’t believe it. She’d practically lost an Olsen Twin! I even tried to work out with her once and was stunned by her badassery. Stunned. Standing there. Baffled. But I remember her saying just because your waist goes down does not mean your confidence goes up. I still feel like a fat girl. I didn’t understand. I just looked at her hips salaciously and asked question after question about what she did to achieve such results. I would ask the same things over and again as if there was some magical part in there that I’d missed. There was no magic. My friend’s name was not Sabrina. She paid real money to a gym every month, she used her time there wisely and she watched what she ate. And when I say she watched what she ate, I mean she wasn’t just counting calories, Ladyfriend wasn’t settling for meals with high sodium or cholesterol–she made all-around wise, healthful choices. Her secret weapon was soup.
I tried to see her reasoning, but it didn’t work out. I mean I love soup, too, but she was ordering veggie chicken noodle, I was ordering broccoli cheddar–southern style with butter like butter was going out of business. I made little progress.
From this experience, something worked itself out in my brain, though. Does it necessarily make sense? No. But here’s what happened: I looked at Ladyfriend’s veggie soup thing and I thought, okay, what I gotta do is find something crazy healthy that I love to eat. And I gotta choose that option every so often. Not all the time. Every so often. It was a slow start, yes, I love veggies, always have, but I’m from a family that makes bacon by the pound. I grew up on cabbage soup (with a bacon garnish), green beans (with a bacon garnish) and bacon (as a legitimate meat). It was a delicious childhood. It was also a busy adolescence, though. I was cheerleading, baton twirling, scouting, fundraising, stepping, and my favorite thing to do when I wasn’t doing that other stuff was climbing in the woods, building forts in the trees. That was my hometown,Clarksville, Tennessee. I was burning off that bacon until I got call center job in Florida, commuting 45 minutes to and from work and just generally being a lazybutt. Thing is, I’m still a lazybutt! And I lost 80 pounds! That’s why I’m writing this post, because, logically, if I’m a lazybutt and I managed to drop 80 pounds, then you [or your mom, or your cousin or your coworker or whoever else might need your encouragement] can do it, too.
For now here’s a before and after of yours truly.
Clearly, weighing in at 215 pounds did not stop me from fabulousness.
Some extra credit I did for my yoga class, here’s my perfected backbend at 134 pounds.
[I’ll try and dig out better ones for Part Two!]